Day 124 – Embracing Change….

Headaches, sweating, nausea, electric shocks in extremities and tinnitus…. and loving every minute of it… Yes I did watch an episode of get smart today, mainly because standing up was accompanied by a sudden urge to fall down… Lots of fluids followed by lots of fluids has been the order of the day… Other than a brief trip to the supermarket that is, which was timed around 75mg of SNRI (down from 225mg)… You may think all that sounds like a disastrous day, it wasn’t… I haven’t felt more like myself in years, or to be accurate, I felt like my old self, looking at my current self and saying “whoa man! What the hell is going on with you?”… And I kind of looked back and said “yeah I know”… Not sure if the conversation with myself is a good sign, but I might be one of the few people left talking to me these days?… I mean I can be an argumentative so and so, on the best of days. Dealing with serious depression and taking medication made me argumentative, moody and a bit dim… Then I added anti smoking medication for the last few months, that just made me an arse too… I was thinking of apologizing to the long list of people I have upset over the past 5
Years, 2 years or 3 months; but to be honest it seems easier just to start over… The cool people will just cut me some slack, and the anal people will try and make me feel bad, and I will avoid them… I am kind of putting this post out as an open apology, I am sorry for over reacting to whatever stupid thing you said (still not got the hang of that)… I am still probably going to be moody, occasionally sarcastic and intolerant of stupidity, but I will also be quick witted, passionate, creative and that annoying kind of charming that makes you fancy a quick snog… Did I mention my brain works faster when not stewing in pharmaceuticals?… Some people I know don’t know me… That’s not an issue for me, but do try and remember that for 5 years I have been a bit hazy and may not remember what I did to annoy you, before that I may have been a bit drunk?… So embrace the change, and to celebrate that change here is a picture of some change I sorted today…

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