Day 98 – I am Sherlocked….

To be specific, I need a Watson to my Holmes… There’s a little insight into how I see myself, but arrogance aside I do better with someone to bounce ideas off… As fun as the kids are to chat to, they are not the mental sparing types..

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Sometimes I just need a live target to bounce things off… I know it is not good for me to run things endlessly in my own head, I just end up finding every possibly flaw, no matter how unlikely… There is no real replacement for someone that knows how your brain works, accepts you but also doesn’t humour or coddle you…

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I have a Moriarty, but she’s not talking at the moment, she has been a bit pissy since she pushed me off a large waterfall, and I didn’t drown… So applications are now open, job requirements should be obvious to anyone clever enough to get the job, I refuse to spoon food you people… However the position will be given without interview to this Watson if they ask…

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you may also have noticed the lack of progress (or at least writing about it) on the blog in relation to vintage, art or life in general… I am afraid that is a side effect of two things mainly… First giving up smoking and secondly my brain appears (to me) to be doing the intellectual equivalent of pushing the go pedal to the floor and dumping the clutch… Lots spinning and noise but very little forward momentum?… Bouncing back and forward between doctors is not helping… The red pill helps depression and anxiety, but the blue pill helps Bi-polar II, we will just try this first, and then that… So being almost at the point of a productive vaguely manic period is held just at the moment of kicking off, like some kind of tantric muscle clenching of my skull… Not a very satisfying result…. I can see why people bin the pills and the temptation to just self manage is riding high at the moment… I have that solo parent dilemma of school vs cost of school, well not a dilemma any more, they will be attending my school of choice next year, the dilemma is paying for it… Actually dilemma is too strong a word, as is problem, it is a puzzle to be solved and I have found all the edge pieces and another bit that has clouds on it…. So I am sure I will work it out…  The game is a foot!!!!!

 

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