Something like the Hippocratic Oath….

or something… do no harm… that is the resolution that has started so badly this year…. Today I have worked myself into the wonderful numbness of pain…. 34 degrees and no breaks… even a thumb blow from a hammer was a welcome distraction… I will be away from social media for a bit… I need time to get my head together and deal with doing the wrong thing for the right reason, or the right thing for the wrong reason… I need time to get together a list of goals and deeds, to appease my guilt or prevent karma from bitch slapping me into a coma…. The straw has finally broken my back, and I can’t go on the way I am… So maybe 2013 will be a year of penance, because while I have never set out to be a destructive force in the world, I have refused to accept my short comings, and this has caused others pain…. Today instead of turning a new leaf, I accidentally spray painted some gold…. Hope that doesn’t kill the plant…

ivy

Apologies, like confessions are meaningless selfish things unless they accompany real change…. I am striving for real change, to repair the damage done to those around me, not to assuage my own guilt…

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